Letters from Ground Zero

On this page I'm hosting some of the longer, clearer letters I've gotten from people who've come to awakening while in a The Living Method Direct Pointing Session. Due to the personal nature of some of the content, and the blasted-mind that sometimes accompanies awakening, the reader may not quite understand 100% of what the writer is saying.  Regardless of any relative hazards, you'll find more than enough in these letters to get an intimate feel for what awakening can mean from ground zero.
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This came in this morning from Paul B. of Waltham, Massachusetts. If you read closely enough, I think you can get a contact high!

> HI ME:)
>
> IT'S THE SO CALLED SEPTEMBER 10. 2013 4AM. THIS BODY JUST WOKE UP. OH.. THERE IS NO PAUL. NOTHING....NO TIME...NO SPACE...NOBODY.
> I AM ONENESS!!!!! YES!!!!! OH MY GOD!!!!! :-)OH MY GOD...
> IT'S ALL ME. IT'S JUST LIKE BACK IN 2008 EXCEPT THERE IS NO 2008. NO 2013. OH MY GOD. THIS IS JUST NOW. ONLY THIS. OH MY GOD.
> I WANT TO WAKE UP THIS OTHER SO CALLED BODY...THIS SO CALLED MY WIFE....OH MY GOD.... IT'S ALL ME.
> THIS SO CALLED BODY IS IN THE SO CALLED KITCHEN...IT'S ALL ME...JUST WENT OUTSIDE....ALL ME.....AFTER THAT LOOKED IN A MIRROR....OH MY GOD.....WHO IS LOOKING? ME ME ME ME ME ALL ME. LAUGHING.....OH MY GOD.....I AM REPORTING TO MYSELF...OH... THERE IS REALLY ONLY ONE THING GOING ON...IT'S ME....
> HI FROM ME TO ME!!! .:) THANK YOU ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :-)
>
> ME:-)

This letter is from the absolute funniest DPS I have ever conducted--and one of the most successful.  Actually I find that many times it's those who can laugh who receive the most.

I Skyped Hamsa Hilker, who lives in a little town on the Pacific coast, up near Monterrey, California, and we had what you might call an un-DPS!  I'll tell you why.  Hamsa has been in the Nondual community for a long time.  She's 75 years old, and she'd had two large awakenings.  She figured she was done.  

Then she stumbled onto this website.

Hamsa, who's a veteran of many skillful teachings, listened to my "Oneness in  a Nutshell" video a couple of weeks ago, and came to a third brilliant awakening while it was playing.  Only this time she saw more deeply and clearly than she ever had before.  She went on a 'hilarity binge'', and shared her excitement and enthusiasm with me in several mad-with-joy emails that were both insightful and terrifically funny.  

Hamsa then scheduled a DPS.  Now, these sessions can be a lot of fun, depending on the client.  By the same token, most people are keyed up, and a little nervous.  It's par for the course.  I've also had plenty of people relate their gnawing fear at the beginning, and a few people who've met me were terrified.  I get it.  Ego does not like visiting Fred's house.

Hamsa, however, was not keyed up, or nervous.  Hamsa was not at all frightened.  Hamsa was awake!  I dialed her up on Skype, we spoke, and as the screen cleared I saw this little old lady sitting at a desk smiling while wearing huge, ornate, golden, Elton John-style glasses!  On top of her head she had a full-size, white and red, plush CHICKEN HAT!  I exploded into laughter and so did she.

This is spontaneous freedom in action. You can almost hear,  "I'm going to put a chicken on my head to make Fred laugh, and I don't give a tinker's damn what he thinks about it, or me!"

When the dust cleared from our initial laughter, I asked her, using a somber, spiritual-teacher-type tone, "So is that a chicken on your head, or are you just glad to see me?"  We exploded again!  That kind of fantastic, spontaneous nonsense went on for the next two hours.

Granted, we did have our serious moments.  Hamsa cried a good deal, but told me she was not sad.  She was just so happy to be home.  And guess what?  Once again she thought she was done.  I'll let Hamsa tell you the rest.  She sent this to me the day after our meeting.

(All photos are courtesy of Wikipedia) 

Hey Fred,

You are  not kidding about the unexpected magic of what happens in a DPS with the unit who calls himself Fred.   What I didn't expect was it to be an ongoing internal "undoing" without Fred !  How could one have imagined.
It started with   when you and I admitted ...we know that  we are (that's self-evident) ....but you asked:   "do you know what you are. ?   With that little "messin with the mechanism"  the great living revelation I got with [name of a famous teacher--ed.] (God's will is "What Is") collapsed with seeing that  I still thought I knew   what "what is..is"  Ha Ha.  I didn't know that until  yesterday's DPS with Fred's major ("messin' with the mechanism") .... that the  [famous teacher-inspired--ed.] revelation was  just a pre-requisite for something I had no idea was coming with huge upgrade with Fred.

In fact, I almost cancelled our appointment cuz inquiry never worked for me and "direct pointing" was the last thing I wanted to do.....like taking a step backward for something that was already doin' fine. (so much for knowing what is going on under the radar).

Automatically now and over and over throughout my daily daily, a  belief or judgement or fear, or self-criticism, or whatever....will arise and almost simultaneously I get my own inner voice that says: " How can you know that ?"  Its obvious I can't and there is what I call a huge Cosmic Pants Down moment with inner guffaw and laughter to be caught red-handed thinking I know what's going on !   This is across the board Fred with news about Syria or a belly ache or someone saying nice things about me, ....you get the picture...the ever rising and disappearing and ideas, feelings sensations etc I thought I knew what were about. ! !

What astounds and delights me is my own inner voice rises without trying and works the miracle.... "How  can you know that" ??   Then immediately and  almost  simultaneous comes the  great Cosmic Pants Down and giggle and relief.....I frickin' can't know  

Everything is strangely new  and strangely the same AND  the beat goes on in "no time" which I experience  as now.  Amazing.  Thanks a bunch

From:  The lady with the chicken on her head ....we both got danced real good by what we don't know what yesterday.  Ha ha ah ha.   I suspect its the only thing goin' on as you and I and them and those.....  Glory Hallelujah.........ha ha ha ha 

 

As soon as I read this amazing letter, I immediately wrote Hamsa back asking if I could use it on the site, along with her name and location.  She not only said yes, she said this:

 

Yeah, sure....I can't remember what I said, so I like your idea of editing it.

The article you wrote for Advaita Vision (re: Book of Undoing)  gave me a fuller picture of the breadth and scope of this work that's dizzingly exploded in only a few years.  I thought to myself  "yup, yup there was a Big Bang for the material universe,  and now comes the Big Bang for the invisible universe inside homo sapiens (just sayin')

As the days go by, there is an extraordinary download of surprises from the fallout of "How can I know this" ? "happening"  My life since childhood was driven by a survival need to know what the craziness around me was.  It's so obvious that after both Big Bang type awakenings 1980 and 1999  after each,  it was not long until  I built up knowledge about "what happened" and didn't know I had made myself secretly special.  The interesting thing about our DPS was right from the "get go" that was the first thing you headed into to dismantle.  What is remarkable as the days pass I have my own ongoing DPS that is expanding in my daily daily, in a very amusing and liberating way ....to say the least.  Not just that, but like a shower or download of stuff that keeps on unfolding and while its self-evident and  obvious, the paradox is equally true (no problem) that I haven't a clue what's really going on.  It feels like love, but how would I know ?
  I loved bumping into the Wei Wu Wei chapter you posted on your website.....where the author describes the clown making messes and   thinking the applause is for him !)   My arrogance was hidden under a fog of spirituality ..   I am so delighted to see our DPS bust the door off such a basic delusion.  

The kicker Fred, is how could you possibly know to hone in on this primal "mote in my eye" ?  For me it confirms Jesus' words:

 "Don't try and take the beam out of your brother's eye....first remove the mote from your own eye" ......Ha Ha ah ha  "I'm the clown with the mote and Fred blew a hole in it"     I feel its just the beginning because the inner "pants downs" are ongoing and while it could be embarrassing .....its the opposite....I'm laughing and I am so delighted to be "found out" by such a merciful exposure on an ongoing basis.  I'm telling you this (sorry) because who would understand me ? ....I don't even "get it" myself....but I know you would without needing to say a word back
For me,  I am  convinced that we are not here just to wake up once, but to wake up and wake up and wake up delightedly again and again from even the latest  mind-blow out,  no matter how extraordinary and transforming the last one was.
Time/space for me now is BF (before Fred) and AF (after Fred) and its because in all my other awakenings, I still had a "yeah, but" that's because I still  thought I  knew something, and I didn't have a clue it was operating.  If it pops up again and I'm sure it will, I have an ongoing inner Hamsa  DPS that says:  "If you obviously don't know what you are, how can you possibly know what anything is --I mean ANYTHING (inner or outer)  Oh joy ! I am supremely surprised  for this crack in the matrix to let the light in.

I trust Skippy [Hamsa's pet name for God, or Tao--ed.] will give the Fred Unit the strength to carry out what dropped on his shoulders  to do this work globally.  So..many soul's have ear's to hear now it appears.   Heart breaks open with happy  tears for suffering humanity that is so ready for a new day....   It's like Skippy picked up a broken suffering  Fred unit and thought: "Yep, I can use  this to do the job".
You think ?  

                                              

A day later I got this letter.

 

Hi Fred,  

The Book of Undoing came today and I am only on the first chapter.  Our session was only the beginning Seeing.  More unfolds today as today "The Book of Undoing" arrived and I couldn't even get past Chapter One without   another crack in the matrix (a corollary of our session)
  I shouldn't take your time to read this, but,  I can't help myself:  On Page 16 you are speaking about what happens in a session :...... "No one really knows how; no one  really knows why it did..(it's) ..THATS WHAT IS .. and that's all that matters". BINGO here is where the clarity door flew wide open and What IS was doing the session.  No wonder I thought it was Fred's gift.  It was but I didn't have it then that Fred was What Is....Hamsa was What Is....the questions came from What Is ...the crack in the matrix was What Is.....the life-changing aftermath was What Is......

All the mind can do with that is bend over in disbelief and wonder at what "gets this" ?.....It just couldn't be anything but God's will or God himself and I are that. (What Is)    its all rising and falling  NOW (no clue what that is UNLESS  it's  ......  yup yup..  Oooooooooooh spooky but as normal as apple pie at the same time.

So that means our session was not about Hamsa and /or Fred at all....just  "What Is" wanted to do that and I am sooooooooo glad we had nothing to do with it and yet we ARE IT same/same. 

Our session was simply a crowbar to dismantle my thinking I knew what What IS  was...... I can't know (I got that "seeing" big time with you (my mind can never know  HOWEVER, ....... something shines thru the not knowing and it's in-your-face  obvious it could blow all the circuits here and it would still be What Is....IS What I am
 .......do you know what that means for me ?  It means What Is    will be the only thing going on in my death and dying that is on the horizon...  its the out-of-control fear of an adrenalin rush when my heart goes into arrhythmia....its my bad-ass attitude which  the old spiritual ego tried to get rid of, its every rising and disappearing thought/emotion or body sensation that I took ownership for....what a magic trick separation is.....That was it too.   I just need to stop writing and go calm down and run some of this energy off at the seashore.
  All this and I only got to page 18 !

Bye for now,

Hamsa 

 (still in amazement at how Awakened Clarity got its start, how the books were written, how the website was birthed.....it is only understandable from the view that it ALL was only What Is in action, including the humanity of Fred.
..so glad you have Betsy, the 4-legged ones and all the people you mentioned who encouraged and supported you in the beginnings of Awakened Clarity.   I almost forgot....they all are the inconceivable What Is  .....I

Please do not write back.....I just couldn't hold it all inside

Stunned by joy that I can now face a world apparently in the last stages of insanity knowing my mind can't know what is happening, but "Something is wildly understood.....its only WHAT IS   in form and can't be said.

Is this the second coming of Christ ?   Just sayin'

hh

Our next letter is from Georgette Cressend of Asheville, NC.  She and a friend came to my house on September 7, and in separate DPS sessions they both woke up.  I got this from Georgette the next day.

Hi Fred,

Thank you again for our session yesterday and for including me on your "short list." ( i'm just noticing how unaffected this unit is by such an inclusion, which would normally be used as mega-hype for this human!!!)

Well, the dps has emptied my tackle box, and i didn't even know i was a fisherman. there's nothing left here to fish with, to get things with, no more casting into a sea of negotiation and manipulation.

the worms and minnows have been set free, free to be just as they are ... free from this 'fisher' who thinks she has to use them for getting what she wants, for catching something, anything! 

hmmmm ... the tackle box is disappearing into its own emptiness.

i see now how heavy it had become. unlike this unit with its bottomless pit, the tackle box kept filling up, and a bigger one would have to replace it. 

oh, what joy to be free of it! just at the right time too. they don't make tackle boxes any bigger than this last one !! 

isn't it so divine that right when i ran out space for more tackle, you came along being the space for it, so i could see it IN me, instead of AS me!!! 

omg, the infinite expanse of THIS!

Ecstasy is flowing so fluidly here. HERE ... I used to trample all over that word, thinking i knew what i was saying. Who knows, i may trample it again ... only to wake up to THIS.

Thank you, Fred ... for ... 

The chicken lady's response [I told Georgette and friend the story while there were here] is all out complete!!

"Its obvious I can't and there is what I call a huge Cosmic Pants Down moment with inner guffaw and laughter to be caught red-handed thinking I know what's going on ! "

Could it be said any better???!!! 

so lovingly grateful,

georgette


The following day I got this happy note: 

This just happened ... 

i was sitting in the den noticing beingness. Then IT moved to the TV ... 

omg, i fell in love with the TV, and it wasn't even on!

Then beingness flitted around the room seemingly moving to the couch, the blinds on the windows, the lamp, all sorts of things ... and they were all so glad to see me, and i them, to meet for the first time as/in THIS.

oh, how i have missed the pleasure of OUR being here.

my heart is still pounding with immense delight!

in joyful wonderment,

georgette


Ten days later, Georgette sent this out to some friends, including me.

The DPS itself gracefully guided me into a depth of clear seeing that could not have ever been imagined.

Since the session, what used to be a self-to-no-self-oscillation has seemingly disappeared into THIS, THE EXPANSE OF PURE LOVE, the AWAKENESS in which the illusion of oscillation seemingly takes place.

All sanctions have been lifted, allowing a constant stability and steadiness in the midst of form, whether the form arises as thought or people or sensations or feelings or stories. It’s all allowed to come and go without any effort or attempt from the unit (Fred’s word for body/mind) to change anything.

Every day doings get done without the usual (in)tense involvement by georgette. There is a laid-backness, a complete okayness with Life unfolding moment to moment ... without needing to know what's next.

Effort is missing, which is the only way it can be when there’s no one wanting anything or expecting things to be different than they are.

The georgette patterns must effort; no georgette pattern, no effort.

Georgette and her perceived hostel are still appearing, but not as master, only as servant to THIS.

There is a sweet abandon that opens wide to even being found out … as a nihilistic nun or a raging renegade pretending to be the reincarnation of St. Theresa.

It doesn't matter what the matter is, THIS is unmistakable and smiling back at ME/ITSELF through all of it.

And, yes, bacon and flap jacks and eggs and cinnamon rolls and anything else your heart desires!

When did you say you were coming, Friday night or Sat morning?

You are welcome any time.


love and hugs,

georgette

 

This next letter is from someone many of you will know: Paul McGillivray  of Meeting Truth.  This letter has been in the testimonials section of the Meetings page for several months, but it really deserves more attention.  It is amazingly clear for someone who's just woken up.  Paul and I did a DPS one night, and I got this from him the next morning.

GOOD MORNING, FRED. Wow! OK , where to start? I wanted to check in with you and firstly say a massive 'THANK YOU'. Your energy last night was incredible - you just didn't give up!
The clarity began to deepen pretty early on, but halfway through, the mind started saying 'it's not going to happen', but beingness just kept surrendering to now, and dropping the 'i know' to give in to the 'knowingness', and finally without Paul noticing really, this subtle shift, no, not a shift, no movement - maybe a 'reveal' happened, and this awakening was seen to be what has always been, can never not be, that there is nothing but this awakening-ness.

  

Paul was silent for the hour or so after our call, and the LSD-like beingness, maybe clarity, dropped away a little after a while, but instead of where previously the mind thought 'aha, you've lost it', it was known that it's impossible to lose what you are, that the very fact that a recognition of 'having it' or 'losing it' can be happening at all is because of this beingness, this knowingness of the experience of now. And so now, simply as the attention is brought back to the beingness, so returns the Presence and Clarity, and a living from the silence and stillness from which experience arises. And Paul wonders what all the fuss was about. Why was he searching for what he already was, and how did he not see it before?

And then I see that I did see it before, but simply didn't recognise it - in inquiry, watching Paul do the washing up, that was beingness, simply being, and then I see that even when Paul doesn't realise it, and isn't 'practising', he is still beingness, watching, listening, being - but not a *thing* watching, listening, being, but the watching, listening, being, *itself*.  I'm not that which watches, I am the watching. I'm not that which hears, I am the hearing. I am the aliveness in everything, I am not only the listening, but the thing being listened to. All of this is within this beingness which I can not ever not be. Beautiful, simple, sooooo obvious. And yet so clearly just the tiniest of non-shifts - this isn't a change - awakening isn't a change at all. DOH!
   

And it becomes clear what the embodiment is - this 'waking down' - that the habits of believing that Paul is in charge continue to pop up and this is seen, and seen through, repeatedly. And this is continuous, a never-ending process of seeing-through (putting aside the fact that time is an imaginary construct, as there is only now) - Awakening begins the process - although that isn't quite right either. Awakening is the process and the processor. hahaha! It is seen that this needs to sink in and digest, and more understanding needs to happen.
   

I'm very aware that what I've written has been written and read a thousand times before, but it comes from not a place of remembering now, but from a place of being. Of aliveness. Of knowingness. There's a meaning in these words that was never seen or understood before. Wow. Most importantly, you did a fantastic job, what you do is as brilliant as Jeannie and I had suspected, and I will forever be grateful for last night, and what you continue to do. I'll start reading your book tonight :) 

Thanks Fred, you're the man.
                       

Much love,                          

Paul 

Paul and I had a Clarity Session together not long ago.  He was experiencing a sense of oscillation [where Awakeness seems to be with us, and then gone], and I was able to bring him back to present brightness during that session.

I just got this follow-up email from Paul the other day; I'm printing here an excerpt from a longer email.  It's the very best kind of news a teacher can get.  Let us dance!

Hi Fred,

Wonderful openings have been happening with me since our last email exchange - your reminding me that oscillation is part of the process, and that it all is the same anyway really sank in after I watched your video, and along with reading your wonderful blog posts, and the letters from Mike [a client sent to me by Paul who's sent me letters that I've built two AC posts around], it all just kind of clicked, and I jumped up laughing, watching this body wave his hands in the air, and seeing again, but more profoundly, that it ALL is happening without the 'doing' of the Paul character, and that what I truly am is experiencing this happening. Cloudy, clear, upside down or back-to-front, it's all the same thing, all perfectly beautiful oneness, onenessing. Always, whether my mind thinks it's clear or not - it's irrelevant, the sky is always the sky, and always blue above the clouds. Always. Perfect. Untouched.

I'm now trusting the process, and not 'trying' to be clear or unclear, but just naturally noticing when the habitual identification, or - more frequently - the feeling that something should be different to how it is, and bringing my attention back to now, where I see that the clear is is the same as the unclear. No should's. No shouldn'ts. And, ironically, clearness is more frequent. Ha!

Big love Fred,

Paul

 

MORE TO COME LATER